Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled.

Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on.

Takes him hours to watch 60 minutes.

He sets himself incredibly low standards, which he consistently fails to maintain.

A prime candidate for natural deselection.

Was left on the Tilt-A-Whirl a bit too long as a baby.

When you left your home, you deprived the village of it’s idiot.

Bright as Alaska in December.

The wheel’s spinning, but the hamster’s dead.