Church Quotes

It were better to be of no church, than to be bitter for any.

I don’t go to church. Kneeling bags my nylons.

Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to the garage makes you a car.

The church or company of worshipers (whether true or false) is like unto a corporation, society, or company: which companies may hold their courts, keep their records, hold disputations, and in matters concerning their society may dissent, divide, break into schisms and factions, sue and implead each other at the law, yea wholly break up […]

Who builds a church to God, and not to fame, will never mark the marble with his name.

I still went to church regularly, though, until I was eighteen years old. Then suddenly, the light bulb went on over my head. All the mindless morbidity and discipline was pretty sick – bleeding this, painful that and no meat on Friday. What is this shit?

Some to church repair, Not for the doctrine, but the music there. These equal syllables alone require, Though oft the ear the open vowels tire; While expletives their feeble aid to join, And ten low words oft creep in one dull line.

My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.

To discriminate against a thoroughly upright citizen because he belongs to some particular church, or because, like Abraham Lincoln, he has not avowed his allegiance to any church, is an outrage against that liberty of conscience which is one of the foundations of American life.

No person can be punished for entertaining or professing religious beliefs or disbeliefs, for church attendance or nonattendance.