Mark Twain Quotes

The way it is now, the asylums can hold all the sane people but if we tried to shut up the insane we should run out of building materials.

(Twain on Cain): it was his misfortune to live in a dark age that knew not the beneficent Insanity Plea.

We have an insanity plea that would have saved Cain.

He said: “I will make him as innocent as a virgin.” He thought a moment, and then said, “I will make him as innocent as an unborn virgin;” which covered the ground.

The innocent who could laugh with joy didn’t dare to because they were sitting beside a guilty friend who didn’t dare to.

The English are mentioned in the Bible: Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence in society.

It is a solemn thought: Dead, the noblest man’s meat is inferior to pork.

The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.

This is indeed India; the land of dreams and romance, of fabulous wealth and fabulous poverty, of splendor and rags, of palaces and hovels, of famine and pestilence, of genii and giants and Aladdin lamps, of tigers and elephants, the cobra and the jungle, the country of a thousand nations and a hundred tongues, of […]