Don’t look now, but there’s one too many in this room and I think it’s you.
Groucho Marx Quotes
Outside of a dog, a book is probably man’s best friend; inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.
Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go somewhere and read the book, I might have a little fun!
I cannot say that I do not disagree with you.
I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. The recipes were to be the routine ones: how to make dry toast, instant coffee, hearts of lettuce and brownies. But as an added attraction, at no extra charge, my idea was to put a fried egg on the cover. I think a lot of […]
Years ago, I tried to top everybody, but I don’t anymore. I realized it was killing conversation. When you’re always trying for a topper you aren’t really listening. It ruins communication.
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
I have nothing but confidence in you, and very little of that.
A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast.
My mother loved children – she would have given anything if I had been one.
