This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won’t be.

Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn’t coming.

Sarcasm: intellect on the offensive.

Since my last report, he has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.

Has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it.

Jack eating rotten cheese did say, “Like Sampson, I my thousands slay.” “I vow” quoth Roger “so you do, And with the self-same weapon too.”

When she opens her mouth, it seems that this is only to change whichever foot was previously in there.

He’s so dense, light bends around him.

He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.

If brains were taxed, he’d get a rebate.