Ambrose Bierce Quotes

Behavior, n. Conduct, as determined, not by principle, but by breeding.

Beg, v. To ask for something with an earnestness proportioned to the belief that it will not be given.

Beggar, n. One who has relied on the assistance of his friends.

Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.

Dawn, n.: The time when men of reason go to bed.

Beauty, n. That power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

Monday, n.: In Christian countries, the day after the baseball game.

Respectability, n. The offspring of a “liaison” between a bald head and a bank account.

Suffrage, n. Expression of opinion by means of a ballot. The right of suffrage (which is held to be both a privilege and a duty) means, as commonly interpreted, the right to vote for the man of another man’s choice, and is highly prized.

Birth: The first and direst of all disasters.